Life! Gotta love those curve balls it throws at you. At least life isn’t boring, eh?
Here is a daily routine that will help you recover and grow from the experience.
Every night, sit down with a pen and a notebook, and answer these questions-
- What 3 things am I most grateful for today?
- How did I feel today? Sad? Confused? Angry? Resentful?
- Why did I feel this way?
- What did I expect to happen, that didn’t happen? Why did I expect that to happen?
- What exactly do I need right now? Money, friends, people to talk to?
- Who is my support network right now, who I can call on if I need something?
- What is the most important thing I need to do tomorrow to improve my life?
Why am I doing this?
This will help you do several very essential things, all at once.
Clearly see the good things in your life, and not just the challenges. Appreciating what you have is essential to a healthy frame of mind.
Process your emotions. If you do not, they will paralyze and crush you. Sweeping them under the rug does not work. I have far too much personal experience making that mistake, many times.
Focus your mind - with all its incredible problem-solving abilities - directly on the parts of your life you can improve.
Empower yourself. You’re taking personal responsibility for creating the life you want, rather than hoping someone else will make your world better for you.
There is a HUGE difference.
Journaling changed my life and helped me through some very difficult times. I wish someone had taught me about it earlier, read a bit more about Journaling here.
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Does Time Heal All Wounds?
I used to think so, but... it seems time doesn't help as much as you'd expect with mental trauma.
Except when you die, of course, we assume.
I recently coached a man who was still missing his girlfriend from high school. They dated for only 2 months. He last saw her 34 years ago, and has not had contact with her since. 34 years... mind-blowing.
The mind reinforces what you choose to think about consciously, and it surfaces memories and imagery attached to what it wants & needs emotionally.
When you experience trauma, I see people heal much faster and more completely if they approach it the same as, say, a broken leg. Get it set right, attended too, care for it. Don't walk on it for awhile, then once it's sound, re-strengthen it and rebuild the muscles with exercise. Done right, it will be stronger than it was before it was broken.